This is our first day homeschooling our two middle crotch goblins. It's only been a couple hours and I just want to go home. From this moment on, whenever my kids get a new teacher, I'm going to find out their favorite type of alcohol. I'll make sure those poor souls are stocked up through the entire school year. It's a holiday? Have some alcohol. My kid got a yellow on their color chart? Have a bottle. They had a test today? Have a gift basket of shot bottles. You survived the entire WEEK? Here's a fifth of whiskey.
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