So, we're transitioning from cosleeping to a toddler bed which is basically just me letting her fall asleep in my bed and then moving her to her bed so I can fall asleep without getting my ass kicked from a toddler that apparently dreams of kung fu fighting only to end up waking in the morning with an ass in my face anyways, because she transitions her little ass right back in bed with us while I'm asleep. It's a fun game we play. Tonight started off like any other night. I got her to sleep, moved her to bed, and passed out. As I was dreaming of a time much simpler than this, a time when I could put food on my plate and eat it all by myself and could shit without an audience, I was rudely awakened by shoes being shoved in my face. This little girls screams in my face "good to good to go!!" Me, being half awake, asked where I was going and she responded with "a store". Now, I'm confused. "Why?", I ask. "Milk", she says. Now, I had just gotten milk at the store so I told her to go to bed because we have milk. "Nooooooooo more!! Cat drink it." What. The. Fuck. It's 2am. Where did the milk go? Why is my kid awake? Why is she wet? This is why!!
That, my friends is a wagon FULL of milk. AN ENTIRE GALLON!! Anybody want a moddler?
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