Friday, February 14, 2020
The blame game
My moddler just blamed me for "shit in a pans" because I asked her why she pooped in her pullup. I said, "Bean, why is there poop in there?" She said, "what? A pooo? Where?"as she looks around like we're playing where's fucken Waldo. I pointed to the humungous turd that looks like it was made by a grown ass man in her pullup and she says, "WHAT? HOW? YOU DO IT?!?!" Full disclosure: I did not nor have I ever shit in my child's pants. It's physically impossible, especially to do it in a way where she would be shocked that it had happened. I'm not a fucken magician. I, without a doubt, KNOW she is the one that shit her pants. I explained that to her, despite her being two and not actually being able to fully comprehend the science behind how I know it wasn't me. She then kicked off her pullup, slid it over to me with her foot, rolled her eyes, and said, "wow, mom!! You shit in a pans." She then told me eeeeewwwww and said "isusting" as she continued to make dirty looks at me. Not only did she call me her version of disgusting, but she seems genuinely upset that I did it, so much so that I'm starting to question it myself. Did I do it? No. I couldn't have. As she has me battling this internal debate with myself, despite me KNOWING that I DID NOT shit in her pants, she escaped and I'm left to clean this shit up. You may have won this battle, you little shit, but you will NOT win this potty training war!! 🤦🏼♀️🙄
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