Where's the moddler?

I'm starting to get sick of playing "Where's the Moddler?" It's like Where's Waldo except, in this situation, Waldo is 3ft tall, devious, and still likes to leave mysterious shits all over my house like she's hosting her own personal Easter egg hunt with a different type of chocolate surprise. If at any point, I don't hear incoherent demands coming from my womb wrecker, I get to search my house trying to find her. The only difference is that even when I win, I lose. She's ALWAYS into something. Tonight, we got out of the bath and as I was explaining to her siblings how the flusher works on the toilet for the millionth time, she disappeared. I decided the first step to playing this game tonight was pouring myself a BIG glass of wine. As I approached the kitchen, I heard, "soooooo good....." I rounded the corner to see her shoveling leftover chocolate pie in her face while simultaneously pushing her freshly shampooed hair out of her eyes with her HANDS. 🤦🏼‍♀️ I asked why she is the way that she is and all she said was, "wat? I no BAD guy." Thanks for that heart melting line, Wreck it Ralph. It looks like we're having pie before bed.