Lettuce pray I romaine sane

Tonight I went in to lay down and found an entire bowl of lettuce in my bed. I was extremely confused. I grabbed it and went out to the kitchen so I could put it away while mentally reiterating the events that occured after dinner. Did I take the lettuce in the bedroom? Am I so tired that I tried to tuck in a bowl of cut up lettuce? Is there a recall on romaine again? Maybe I just had a bad salad and now I'm hallucinating. As I'm putting it away, my middle humpling comes strolling downstairs with no fucks to give about it being wayyyy past her bedtime. Since she was up already, I asked if she knew why the hell there was lettuce in my bed. She looked at me and said, "ummmmm, you told me to put the "acer" on your bed." I informed her that the Acer was a computer and not lettuce. She shrugged her shoulders, looked right at me and said, "I didn't know that. I thought you were just going dumb with your words again." 😳 For those of you that don't know, I have a stutter that gets significantly worse when my kids are driving me crazy and this insensitive asshole thought I was just trying to spit out the word lettuce.