Lost and found

I lost my moddler today. My twat tokens were running in and out of the house to get supplies to clean up the yard. They had to get snacks and take a shit every 15 seconds because apparently physical labor causes my offspring's digestive systems to work faster and harder than they ever have in their entire lives. My husband was off trying to find some insignificant part to some insignificant piece of random technology that he found and decided needed fixed at the exact same time that this chaos was occurring. The dogs have decided that they all hate the cat now so they were torn between barking at the kids coming back in and the cat running around showing her dirt star to everyone because she's either in heat or she's just witness my toddler do it so much, that she seems to think that is how we greet people around here. Either way, nobody is a fan. I was unsuccessfully attempting to play ring leader to this circus when all of a sudden, I realized that it's been about 5 minutes since I've opened a pack of gummies or saw an asshole without fur on it. I looked all through my house, but she was nowhere to be found. As soon as I opened the front door to yell for her siblings to come in and help me find her, I saw the reflection from the sun bouncing off her pale, Scottish skin. She had stripped completely down to her birthday suit, put on a pair of rain boots, and was dancing on the front porch. I've decided that we need to move because I will never be able to face the neighbors again. 🤦🏼‍♀️